THE WORLD WAS MADE FOR YOU

I know. I'm not a poet. I'm just sitting here at work thinking about those annoyingly perfect people who are giant d-bags but somehow people don't notice this. You know the guy that every girl seems to fall over? Those guys always piss me off.



The world was made for you.

Even straight men notice
Your perfect chiseled face
Your easy going demeanor
Never a hair out of place

Do you even notice
Do you have half a clue
Not a one can place a finger on why
Everything works out for you

If you notice you pretend you don’t
When ladies catch your eye
Nonchalant even when it’s the
3rd time that group of girls has walked by

Many a heart has leapt when you beam their way
Perpetually plastered on your face as you stand there so handsomely
Some call it a winning smile; others a cocky smirk
Either way it matches your vacant stare perfectly

Not a care in the world
Always happy and having fun
The world is your plate of oysters
Lap them up until you’ve eaten every one

You are a young man
Your future is so bright
James Brown said it’s a man’s world
And he was right but he didn’t preface ‘man’ with ‘white’

Your voice is loud and strong
Yes, you brim with confidence
Good thing you have command of the room ‘cause
You speak like you’re making an entrance

You feign surprise when others say you’re hot
Get embarrassed, act perplexed
You make a show of that sport you played
See, that’s how I got my pecs

You offer a friendly reminder of exactly why they’re not
You say, with a Thurston Howell-snooty laugh,
I eat healthy and go to the gym everyday
Without knowing it comes across as chaff

The world was made for you and
You’re flawless as you are
No one else makes casual look so chic
With perfection you are on par

The Earth and all the people here
You got us by the nuts
You may have fooled the masses
But I hate your fuckin’ guts